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Should I tell her she is being used?

I am really concerned about my best friends feelings. She met a guy in October who was here on a visa from Jamaica. She married him in March and he has cheated on her several times between October and now including contracting chlamydia. She is really in love with him and thinks that he loves her , but I think otherwise. Should I tell her that I think she is being used?

Posted 41 days ago

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Answers (12)

Helper 		How do you know all of these things and she doesn't? I think there's something missing from your question.

Regardless, you should tell her. Especially since not only does he cheat, but he does so carelessly since he as also contracted a sexually transmitted disease. His behavior is not only emotionally damaging but now endangers her health. What if he contracts HIV? She is obviously in love with not the real man that he is. If you truly are a best friend, your concern would be for her welfare and less about what she will think of you.

40 days ago

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Helper 		My advice would be no, unless you don’t mind ruining your friendship/someone else’s marriage. There are easier ways to handle it without the risks. The best way would be for her to find out the truth by herself although a bit of guidance wouldn’t hurt.

40 days ago

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Mattew 		def....she'll thank u for it

40 days ago

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answergal 		I think you need to mind your own business. It's obvious that she will not listen to reason right now. What you can do is continue to be her friend and offer honest advise but only if she asks. Sometimes people need to fall the hard way to learn a lesson.

40 days ago

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Healthy17 		If he's only on visa, then yes, I think he is using her to stay in your country. She need to get over the fact that it's totally one-sided, and that it's not love if he cheated on her more than once...

40 days ago

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SkyWalker 		How do you know these things about him and of course you should tell her.

40 days ago

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Aan789 		YES!!!!! as her friend, you should definitely go to her!

40 days ago

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Guest07 		Yes, I would most def. tell her. This guy sounds like nothing but one big prob. and will cause nothing but a constant heartache for your friend. One day she will thank you and appreciate what you are doing.

40 days ago

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Advice 		Has she asked? There is most definitely a part of her that knows already. She needs you to be her friend and unless you personally witness his infidelity, stay out of it. The reason is that if you tell her before she's willing to see it, she will resent you. When you're proven right, she still won't come to you because of the 'I told you so' factor. If you do witness his infidelity personally, then tell him to tell her. Meanwhile, be her friend and unless asked, stay out of her relationship.

40 days ago

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Dodolz 		yes but she wont believe you

40 days ago

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Guest07 		well...yea I think you should, save her....just say MAYBE...cause you don't know for sure yet....don't ruined their relationship yet...just give her a idea to look at...or to look for. She'll probably be more cautious towards him...and look for mini leaks in attitude change.

40 days ago

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Guest07 		No, because if she is that stupid then she will probably get mad at you. He could lie and tell her you are just doing that to break them up because you want him. She has to "live and learn".

41 days ago

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